The Raven Watches Me...or was that a Turkey?

So I'm curious. There's another side of me that I'm aware of, but you don't seem all that interested in "taking over" so to speak.

it's of no interest to me.

Then why do you exist?

to observe.

What?

to observe.

you don't like it when it's quiet, do you?

No I don't.

you don't need another side driving you nuts, 
but your mind gets worse when it is silent.

will you get rid of me?

Are you worried about that?

no but I do get to ask.

while I'm at it, should I ask why you always write?

It's therapeutic. Writing down what angers me and what may be bothering me that day helps me calm down.

don't you worry someone may find it?

your secrets will be used against you.

I'm well aware of that factor, but the alternative is acting out on those emotions. You know that's not a good idea. Speaking of writing, that's what Dr. Sautereau suggested the family do. Arwen and I met with her some time ago to discuss the clear wall that's creeping between us. Arwen says she wants us around more but insists on not actually being around us more. Adagio and I need to find some way to balance time at work to actually spend with the kids.

I admit I'm still confused by the girl. Why does she always ask for support then scream when you try to give it to her?

it is like a challenge, no?

How to deal with Rebels

From the moment I took on care of Arwen, I realized I'd face this one day - the dreaded teen years. I'd caught glimpses of her temper here and there, eventually noticing a pattern.

She likes to run.

Now I can't blame her for running away from problems as I did the same thing when I was young.

you were running away 

because you thought you would die.

True.

Arwen runs when the situation is so strongly against her liking that she feels the need to get as far from it as possible. She ran away from home after convincing herself that all adults were evil murderous liars.

then came back.

She was kidnapped and ran away from her birth father...but noticeably stayed away from home for some time.

then came back...

Recently  she sent some ridiculous texts which lead me to believe she was either drunk of high. I found her in the park fighting with Claire, Mitka's daughter. She seemed to not care than she and Claire reeked of weed and instead walked out on the conversation like I had done something wrong as the parent for talking to her. She even had to audacity to claim that Adagio and I were never there for her, and that she'd be better off living alone.

That night, she seemed to have come home, packed some things including the medical kit I bought, and left notes saying she would be away while. I come to find out at a party no less that she and Claire are now a couple and are in the swamps somewhere. Mitka seems fine with her daughter wandering off into the wilderness, but I'm not as lenient.

Poor Arwen my ass. I'm not stressing myself any longer over a child that begs for my help then refuses it with every fiber of her being until she conveniently wants it again. She has two parents more than willing to care for her and beyond, and she's just spitting in our faces for it. Until I hear an honest fucking apology from that girl, as far as I'm concerned, I don't know anyone named Arwen.

so what will you do?

she did call to apologize.

Highs and Lows

Last Thursday struck me as a low point. The MPD, it seemed, was low on cash. Not surprising when you think about it but their method for recouping funds was no surprise either. Okay maybe it was something of a shock.

 I was in the church praying. It had become a ritual of mine after talking to the Father about my son and everything else. I didn't notice the officer watching me until I was done. He seemed to be just a reverent, well aware he was about to arrest me in the house of the God. I sure as hell wasn't happy. i'm just glad none of the sisters or Father Anthony were there to see me.

I would learn later I was charged with falsifying WU records, manufacturing and distributing illegal drugs, kidnapping, and torture. I don't know who made a note of the change in owners' name on my hybrid registry, but the rest of it was bullocks. What was more irritating was the fact the MPD detained me. Not in a cell - I was put on display outside of City Hall. I was made to wear this god-awful orange jumpsuit and sit on display in a cage like some collection item.

 It was reminiscent of my captivity as an experiment. I didn't like to be behind bars let alone on showcase. My friends could see me. Clients could see me. My daughter could see me. Arwen had just recently gotten back after her ordeal with her father, and it turns out Adagio's gone to the mainland.As if things could not descend any lower.

The MPD held me and others hostage for bail, 5,000 credits in my case, and I was not allowed to bail myself out despite the fact I had the money. I think the MPD chief had a bone to pick with me, being the current Ashagi CEO and all. I even joked that it was some form of initiation; every CEO before me had been jailed except for Dr. Parkin I believe. Arwen managed to conjure up some funds, but in the end the lawyer I contracted for Ashagi's legal team footed the bill. Mr. Hector Mendle.

I knew I'd pay for that. Several thousand of your own funds to bail your client out was not a part of Hector's contract. The next night, I went to his office to pay him back. It turns out he didn't want money; he wanted information. On me. I could have refused. I should have refused. I'm uneasy about anyone knowing my past, even my wife. Yet I told him about my past, about Dr. Foster, and about what kind of work I had to do to make ends meet while traversing the mainland as an uncollared, unowned hybrid. He seemed to listen well and assured me he would not use that information against me. He is a lot like Adagio and myself in that regard - we all like knowing things mostly for the sake of knowing.

I honestly felt like crap most of the weekend. Ashagi Head Office was not happy about the jail time. The branch won't pay for it, but my finances will. I was working on getting a larger apartment in the city since the house was likely to come up as an assest when I get a knock on the door.

Guess who?